“Old habits truly never die… they just fester and wait for weakness.”
I thank Marl for the quote. I have always used the phrase: “old habits die hard.” Well, hockey-poo on that. They never die. I was fessing up to my Mother this morning that I had gained 8 pounds. (EIGHT pounds…all of it in my gut.) The battle with food and the habits formed over 40 years of overeating, grotesque binges, and pity-party munching will never go away. I fight everyday and sometimes every minute to beat back this compulsive need to have something in my mouth. Even with the “new” mind set and “new” attitude toward food and lifestyle, the old ugliness creeps in like a fog under my radar. Next thing I know, I’ve eaten an entire bag of “sugar-free” toffee squares! That was the chaser for a half-full bag of apple cinnamon rice cakes. Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhgggggg. (Tearing at my face with clawed fingers) Now some of you kind folks will say, “Well, shu-gah, it was shu-gah freeeee candy. And rice cakes, baby, well they’re good for yah, aren’t they?” I recited this pitful exchange myself as I turned the bag over in my hand to discover I had sucked every crumb and licked every bit of chocolate residue from the wrappers. No excuses.
Someone just make it go away! If I can track down this food zombie hiding in my inner recesses, will someone slay her for me? I’m pretty sure you’ll need to take her head and probably scatter the ashes in moving water because I’m pretty sure she’s able to regroup…stronger and faster than before. (Visions of a 300 pound, rotting fleshed zombie singing really shrill high C’s shambling through Fairview…..shudder)
Speaking of pity parties, you are all officially invited to mine in case you hadn’t figured it out. Today I’m facing old demons and it isn’t pretty. Tomorrow? Well, I’m just going to pull on those red Wonder Woman boots and strap on my metal support garments and go to battle. Wonder Woman versus the Zombie. Tune in for the next installment, my friends. May you all slay a demon-zombie tomorrow and look FABULOUS while you do it.
Mwah.
Julie said,
March 19, 2009 at 1:20 pm
Hang in there!
Julie said,
June 3, 2009 at 11:43 am
Wwwheerrrre aarrreee yoouuuu? You need to write!